Happy Birthday Cupcakes

50 Funny Birthday Messages to Write In Cards

The average person gets around 20 cards per year, so why not make yours stand out with a funny message. 
Perfect Card Messages To Brighten Someone's Day Reading 50 Funny Birthday Messages to Write In Cards 6 minutes Next 24 Warm And Squishy Hug Quotes

Birthdays only come once a year, that is a whole 365 days that you get to prepare the perfect Birthday message, and when is there a better time to write a Birthday message to the ones you love than in a card. That being said, the average person gets around 20 cards per year, so why not make yours stand out with a funny message. Here are 50 messages to write this year that will be sure to make you and the person receiving the card smile and laugh!

Our Favourite Funny Birthday Messages

  1. Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without a Facebook reminder.”

  2. “Forget about the past, you can’t change it. Forget about the future, you can’t predict it. Forget about the present, I didn’t get you one.”

  3. “May your Facebook wall be filled with birthday wishes from people you’ve never met, haven’t seen in years, or genuinely couldn’t care less about.”

  4. “If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas!”

  5. “Well done – you have still been alive for several years!”

  6. “ I always limit my budget on buying birthday gifts according to what that person gave me as a gift on my birthday. Enjoy your gift of nothing!”

  7. “You’re a really hard individual to shop for… so I didn’t get you anything. Happy birthday!”

  8. “Happy birthday – So far, this is the oldest you’ve ever been!”

  9. “Another year older and you’re one step closer to getting those Velcro shoes!”

  10. “Don’t worry about your age… alcohol will make it all better!”

  11. “Yes, we have reached that age… when every compliment we get is usually followed by ‘for your age’. You’re still looking great though… for your age!”

  12. “If anyone calls you old, hit them with your cane and throw your teeth at them!”

  13. “Some things are better with age. Too bad you aren’t one of them.”

  14. “You’re the least famous person I know of who was born on your birthday.”

  15. “Happy birthday! Here is a piece of card to show you how little I care…”

  16. “If I made fun of how many years old you are, it would be beyond funny.”

  17. “Seriously, I don’t know how many more of your birthdays I can handle.”

  18. “Another year older… and you still can’t grow a beard.”

  19. We thought we would get the right amount of candles to put on your cake this year, but quickly ran out of space. Happy Birthday!”

  20. “Seeing as I usually forget everyone’s birthdays, you should consider it a miracle that I’m sending you this message. Happy Birthday!”

  21. “Don’t let your age get you down, it won’t be long until you are allowed to start learning to drive. But until then, on your bike! Happy Birthday!”

  22. “I’m not a fan of overly sweet messages as you know, birthdays are for fun! So let’s ditch the old folks later and get out and about like we used to! Happy Birthday!”

  23. “Happy Birthday, you’re closer to seeing another century pass.”

  24. “Oh yeah, one more year to annoy everyone you know. Happy Birthday, anyway!…”

  25. “Remember when we stayed up late running from the law? No? Good. I don’t either. Happy Birthday oldie!”

  26. “Another year to prove that older doesn’t really mean wiser. Happy birthday!”

  27. “May all your birthday wishes come true — except for the illegal ones!”

  28. “Another year to kick your bucket list to the curb.”

  29. “Oh yeah! You’re getting closer to the age when the government sends you money every month. Happy Birthday!”

  30. “Don’t you wish you were a kid again? Of course not, cause you’re still doing the same things you did back then.”

  31. “Here is a hug! Happy birthday!!!! PS: I’m broke!”

  32. “Will there be cake tomorrow or no?”

  33. “Want to look young today? Play chess with Grandpa.”

  34. “It’s your birthday. The good news is that you’re only as old as you act and right now you’re in kindergarten.”

  35. “I can’t believe you’re 50. You don’t look a day over 49 and a half.”

  36. “The secret to staying young is lying about your age. Happy Birthday!”

  37. “I thought about sending you a birthday card mocking your age, but I decided against it. Remember that when you are writing your will.”

  38. “I just wanted to remind you that you’re a year older than you were last year.”

  39. Don’t fret over another birthday. You were already old.”

  40. “Your birthday is the perfect time to recognize all your wonderful qualities, including the fact that you’re older than me.”

  41. “Did you know that birthdays are good for you? Studies have shown that the more of them you have, the longer you live!”

  42. “Happy Birthday! For everyone’s safety, please skip the candles this year.””

  43. “I hope your birthday celebration is full of many memorable moments, and that you can actually remember some of them the next day!”

  44. “It’s your birthday? As if you needed an excuse to act irresponsibly!”

  45. “May you have loads of fun on your birthday. Remember: Not only does wine getter better with age, but age gets better with wine!”

  46. “May your birthday be filled with all the happiness and joy that an immoderate amount of alcohol can provide.”

  47. “It’s your birthday! This is a big one. Then again, at your age, every birthday is a big one!”

  48. “Happy Birthday! Don’t hurt yourself blowing out all those candles!”

  49. As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes... and I can't remember the other two.
  50. What goes up but never comes down? Your age.

Happy Birthday candles

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